Possible Adoption

[dnudi1@mail.sandi.net]

My husband and I are in our 40's and 2 1/2 years ago became parents for the first time through adoption. We have one daughter and have recently been approved for adoption again. Last week we were notified that we had been chosen to be the parents of a 13 month old boy. He was born with a cleft lip and palate. He was taken from his birth mother due to medical neglect and placed in a foster home. He had lip repair in May and palate surgery in September. We love being parents and we know that any child is a life-time commitment. We will be meeting with the child's social workers this week to help us make the decision whether to adopt him or not.(My husband really wants another newborn.) I have been doing my homework trying to become more informed: it all started with this web site. I also have a good friend who is a speech therapist who works with pre-schoolers. She has been very helpful. We live in San Diego. Are there any doctors here that you could recommend? Or any other advice or recommendations that you could give us? Thanks for your support and encouragement as we make this decision. Deb

[Anonymous]

I hope you find the decision that's right for you ... if this child is to be one of your family, the cleft will soon become the least noticable part of him . Every other wonderful facet of his character and looks will more than compensate ( if compensation is even needed) for the cleft. Both my kids had clefts. Although the time of theops are tough, when they are out of the way we've found in an irrelevance. My youngest needed minor speech therapy, but less than your 'average' child, and we wouldn't change them for the world. The cleft, day to day, is much less of an inconvenience than, say, exzcema.
All the best wishes in the world for you and your family, and good luck in making a decision which suits you all.


Mitchy