A grandmothers point of view

[Jean Joley]

My son, Matt, was born with a cleft lip and palate 25 years
ago. He was my 4th child. I am a nurse who had worked in this
surgery many years prior to Matt's birth. We went through all the
surgerical repairs, etc. We were most blessed to become involved
in a cleft palate support group both locally and nationally. Matt
had the opportunity to meet other babies, children and adults
with clefts. He was able to learn so much. He knew that he was
not alone. Sometimes, he would not say much, but he listened! I
am now the proud grandmother of Alysha. I was present in the
delivery and I was there to hear the Doctor say, "we have a
cleft". I was able to say to my daughter-in-law, Amber, all
the things that I knew would help her. That she did nothing to
cause this, and that Alysha was a "normal baby who happened
to have a cleft". It was so difficult for Matt. He cried so
very hard at her birth. Then all his years of knowlege and
strength came through. He was able to make strong decisions
regarding her care and explain to his in-laws all the things that
would happen to Alysha. It's wonderful to be able to look
backward and see that we, as parents, did some very thing right
with our children. 1.We had Matt meet other people with clefts.
2. We talked about it in our home 3. When our son was older, we
let him be part of the decision making process. Hope this helps
other families. Best wishes, Jean Joley

[Jennifer]

Great post Jean! Your son sounds very strong, but you also
sound like a very strong woman so he obviously would be also.
Thanks for the post!



Jennifer

[Happemom45.aol.com]

Hi, we are considering adopting a baby girl from Korea that
has a bi-lateral cleft lip and a cleft palet. Since you are
familar with the surgeries to repair this, could you inform me a
little of what to expect? I am reading all sorts of stuff but
hearing from someone who has been through it would help
tremendously. thanks....

[ida1918]

I TOO AM A GRANDMOTHER AND MY GRANDDAUGHTER HAS CLEFT LIP AND
PALET. SHE IS NOW 8 MONTHS OLD. THREE MONTHS AGO SHE HAD HER LIP
REPAIRED. BELIEVE ME, SHE CAME OUT OF THE SURGERY JUST FINE. HER
LIP LOOKS FANTASTIC. SHE HAS JUST A LITTLE SCAR BELOW HER NOSE.
THE SURGEON DID SUCH A GREAT AND BEAUTIFUL JOB. SHE ALSO HAD HER
NOSE FIXED. CAN'T EVEN TELL. SOMETIME IN SEPT. SHE WILL HAVE HER
PALET CLOSED. WE LOOK FORWARD TO THIS SURGERY. SHE IS A VERY
BLESSED CHILD. DON'T BE AFRAID. SHE IS SO VERY BEAUTIFUL.

[David]

Hi, i have been through it and i am a perfectly normal 14 year old boy. I have many friends, and no one cares of my birth disorder.
Don't worry